Words for the Week No.30 // Try and fail

These words have been on my mind lately. I can't say I've really succeeded in anything over the past few months, but I can sure say that I've tried. I've done my best each and every day, and this thought somehow puts me at ease. I've found that what I'm most scared of in life is not failure, but not being brave enough to try, and try again. To give it my all. Yes, failing sucks. But having not tried sucks even more.

I've noticed how much more I regret all the things I haven't done due to fear, than the things that I have done and maybe haven't turned out that great. Like owning my Etsy shop for example. It was no success story, but it taught me a lot about myself and what I really want in life. Without that "failure" I would not have learned a valuable lesson. And, I probably would still be wondering the "What if..."s and "why didn't I..."s. What I realized is that learning what you don't like doing, or what you're not good at is just as important as knowing your likes and strengths. Especially if you're multi-passionate like me.

The other important thing I've been noticing in other people's stories is how there really is no over night successes. Before that seemingly quick success you can usually find years of failed attempts. We were watching a show about Modern Talking yesterday, you know that 80's ultra popular German duo,  and I was so surprised to learn how both members of the group had actually had failed careers as solo artists before their success together, which, by the way, one of them didn't even want to be a part of at first, thinking it might ruin his efforts as a solo artist. It's a fascinating story!

I don't think there is one success story that comes without the doubt, fear and failure factor. Everybody who has ever achieved anything great has had those moments when either they themselves, or others, didn't believe in what they were trying to build. The moments when the shit hit the fan. The "NO!"s, the rejection, and the thought of not being good enough. Most everyone has those moments. It's part of the process. And, the sooner we accept it, the sooner we can move on.

This is a concept that has been the toughest for me to adapt, but I truly believe that there are no wasted attempts. Every failure is good for something. Every failure is a way to learn. Without it you would never learn the skills and knowledge to succeed.

Try -> analyze the results -> try to do better - >analyze the results -> rinse+repeat. I don't know how many cycles it will take me to get the formula right, but I'm willing to do the work to get there.

What's the one thing you really need to try again?

xo. Hanna

P.S! You can learn about my latest venture "The Pearls & Scissors Sewing Club" here, and join the mailing list to get the latest and the greatest right below!

Who is your biggest influencer?

Warning! This post is a bit different from what you're used to seeing on Pearls & Scissors, but it's totally worth it, I promise.

Some of you might not now this, but I actually have an MA in psychology. I'm not going to go into the story of how a psychology student became a DIY blogger and operatic singer today. However, for the longest time I've wanted to write about some of the things I learned during my psychology studies that really changed how I think about and view myself and others around me.

Whether you love motivational quotes or not, I think we can all agree that words do have power. The words that others speak influence how we perceive ourselves and our actions. Even the most thick-skinned of us can be unnerved by a negative comment from someone whose opinion we value. On the flip side, an encouragement from a significant other can truly make our day and turn our frown upside down, right?

What we don't often think about, or even realize, is the way the words WE speak to ourselves influence us. How does it make us feel when we put ourselves down? "Quitting your day job before a steady income wasn't very smart, now was it?" "Look at those beer-handles! Lazy much?" "Do you really think you have ANYTHING valuable to offer anyone?" Sound familiar?

Most of us say something along those lines to ourselves. And that's just sad. Would you say anything like that to your best friend? A family member? Anyone you really care about?

Probably not. Why then, do we keep treating ourselves this way? And this is NOT a rhetorical question. Really ask yourself - How do you justify this behavior?

Does it make you more motivated? Honestly, I'd love to say "Yeah, this totally makes me work my ass off!", but the truth is, it just makes me want to curl up in a ball and cry.

Does it help you make changes in your life you need to make? If I'm honest with myself, these types of thoughts just make me feel guilty for not having made these changes already. Or, they might even make me feel I will never be able to make these changes cause I'm such a loser. Does that happen do you, too?

Does it boost your confidence or make you feel better? Nope, never.

Does it help you to find a solution or help you cope with the situation? I don't remember it ever doing so.

It does NOT motivate. It does NOT change anything. It does NOT make you feel better, or help you cope. So, STOP doing it!

I know. It's way easier said than done. I'm a perfectionist in nature, so believe me, being gentle and caring towards myself is the hardest thing to do for me. But, I've realized that I need to give myself the same care and compassion that I would someone I love. Because I DO want to love myself. ME is all I have.

Whenever I feel these negative thoughts swirling around in my mind and it's just pouring shit in my brain, I stop myself and think - "What would you say right now if you were talking to a good friend?"
Sometimes it's easier to put myself into that position than others, but it's always a good thing to at least be aware of the fact that you're putting yourself down and it's not helping. Even if you don't know the right words to say to yourself just yet, just stop for a second and give yourself a break. You will thank yourself later.

Now, consider how you feel when you say something nice to yourself. How do you feel when you get encouragement from yourself? How does it feel to give yourself a mental high five? "Wow, Hanna, you were so productive today. Amazing job!" "You look tired. Time to take a break and refuel. You'll do a much better job once you've rested!" "I know you're just starting out, but you're already doing a great job on getting healthier!"

I don't know about you, but I feel so much more connected with myself, more confident and happier when I say those things to myself. When I speak to myself with respect, gratitude and love, I instantly feel better about myself, my actions, and my life in general.

The thought of talking to yourself this way might seem silly at first. A lot of the times, we put so much focus and weight on what OTHER PEOPLE are saying to us. It might even feel like encouragement or critique from others might make or break us. In the midst of all this outside chatter, we might forget about the inner voice. But, just take a minute to really think about this.

It's estimated that an average person has about 50 000 - 70 000 thoughts per day (sometimes it feels I have 100 000). If we assume that a thought is roughly one sentence, that's a lot of talk going on in our head all the time. Now, it's also estimated by another study that we use about 16 000 words per day. If we divide those into sentences, it would be around 3200 sentences (with an average of 5 words per sentence).  So, you say 50 000 sentences to yourself, but only 3200 sentences to others. How's that for some perspective?

YOU are your biggest influencer. What you say to yourself matters!

These types of posts tend to become a "Great point! I'll get to it someday" thought in my head, so I thought I'd challenge myself and you to really put it into use now. Be a better influence on yourself, and say something encouraging to yourself RIGHT NOW. Did you do it? Good.

And now, for the rest of this week, say something positive or encouraging to yourself every time you brush your teeth. This way, hopefully, the practice of being a good influencer will become a daily habit like brushing your teeth.

Are you in?

xo. Hanna

How I doubled my pageviews in 30 days

It was a little over a month ago when I wrote this post. I'd been struggling with finding a job after our move from Estonia to Germany, and was feeling like a total loser. I was defeated and lost. But, looking back at it now, that day turned out to be a turning point for me. It forced me to get myself together and make a conscious decision. I could either keep fervently looking for a job and feel like sh*t in the meantime, or finally start taking myself seriously and act like this, my blog, was a real business. 

After I'd had a good cry, a heart to heart with my husband, and some time to think, I decided to go for the latter. I started working for myself full time. For the past 6 weeks, I've been getting up at 7am every morning and working for 12-14 hours every day to turn this blog into a business. If you've ever started a business, or tried to monetize your hobby, you might know how hard that is at first. Sure, I've been blogging for years, and sure, I've had thoughts of monetizing my blog many times before, but I had never made a commitment. 

Ever since I started this blog, I've been going back and fort between keeping this a hobby, turning it into a side-job, or going for a full creative career, depending how the week's stats were, and wether or not I'd made any Etsy sales, or had been featured somewhere. I was feeling awesome and so ready to be all business when things were going uphill, but quickly started doubting myself when the blog wasn't growing as quickly as I'd hoped, or the post I'd worked on for hours got mere crickets instead of millions of comments and shares. Ok, maybe not millions, but you get the point. 

What I've realized over the past 6 weeks, though, is that building a business is so different from just hoping to monetize a hobby, or make a little extra money on the side. Building is a conscious action, usually requiring a plan, some knowledge, and the right tools. Very different from hoping to build something. You don't accidentally build a table, right? Well, you don't accidentally build a business neither. Hoping is wishing something happened despite you. Building is making sure it happens in spite of everything else.

Which is not to say that a hobby-blog couldn't grow to a point where monetizing would happen almost by accident. Or, that when you start taking your blog seriously, from a business perspective, you'll be an instant success, and money would start pouring in. You know from my recent income report that's not true. What I am saying is that how you view your goal, whether it be growing a blog, or pursuing a creative career, will determine the rate of your growth, and infinitely better your chances of making those dreams real. Look at it this way - when you start walking from Tallinn to Rome without a map, you might still get there, but the chances are way better when you start with a clear route in mind and a map to guide you.

When I started Pearls & Scissors, I had a very clear vision for my blog and an intention of turning it into a profitable side-business. I remember being very excited back then about the prospect of making money doing what I loved. I even had some initial success. I had over 44 000 pageviews in the first month alone, and an average of over 39 000 pageviews/month for the first 6 months. My blog kept slowly growing, but at some point I felt it wasn't growing quickly enough. I wasn't getting the opportunities I thought I would be, and slowly but surely, I started to lose hope. Why wasn't this happening already? The thing is, I entered this with no idea how to get to where I wanted to go. And to be honest, I don't even think I knew exactly where that was. All I had was this elusive dream of a paycheck that had something or everything to do with my blog. So, I was basically hoping for success.

At some point I got tired and confused. Somewhere along the way I went back to being a hobby-blogger. Which is totally fun and cool, but not at all what I set out to do. When I wasn't getting the results I wanted fast, like yesterday, I gave up and hoped that things would magically happen for me. Time and again, I'd get inspired to give it another go. And another. And another. I hoped to build a business, but I didn't have the tools or knowledge, nor a plan. 

What I realize now is that hoping isn't enough. If I want to see results, I need to have a plan of action. If you keep hoping for things to happen, they might never. But if you make a plan, get the tools, learn what you must, and do what you can every single day, eventually you will make it happen.

So, how did I grow my blog from 35 000 pageviews a month to 75 000 pageviews in just 30 days?

1) I got my sh*t together and made a conscious decision to build a business.

2) I set myself smart goals I could attain, and a clear plan to follow.

3) I showed up each and every day and did my best.

I hope this inspires you to make a conscious decision to do the thing you've been hoping for. To take matters into your own hands, and make it happen instead of waiting for it to happen to you. 

xo. Hanna

P.S! If you haven't already, go an check out my awesome new crafty e-book!

5 Things I've learned // On goal setting

Remember the 30 days 30 goals challenge I began in October? Well, you might be wondering what happened to it. I know, I know, I was supposed to write the conclusion weeks ago, but alas, here we are, at the beginning of December.

Truth be told, I completed about half of my 30 goals. That would constitute a failed challenge, right? Well, so I thought at first, but the I started thinking. Whenever you learn something about yourself in the process of a challenge, it's always a win. So, here are 5 things I learned during the 30 days 30 goals challenge:

1) Long To-Do lists stress me out. The moment I compiled that list of 30 things I felt over-whelmed. I knew it was going to be hassle, and I already didn't want to do it. I hoped that the challenge would motivate me to work harder to cross things off, but no. Note to self: make to-do lists that are short and sweet, 10 items tops. Keep different category lists separately, because seeing them all together will freak you out.

2) Defining a manageable and well-defined goal is the key to success. One thing I noticed was that I crossed off most of the smaller, more manageable tasks that required a very specific action. Like, have shoes repaired, or take old clothes to H&M. Other tasks, like pack all kitchen items, or pack all clothing were left undone, because they depended on other circumstances I wasn't clear on at the moment, and were too blurry for me to take concrete action on.

3) When I don't need to do it, no list will make me. There were items on that list that I could've easily complete, but I still didn't because I was always out of time, and they just didn't seem that important. They were not things I needed to do, more things I thought I had to do.

4) I stink at time management. You see, I think I'm Wonderwoman. Yes, I believe I can accomplish a weeks worth of tasks in one day. And then I get all grumpy and self-accusing when it doesn't happen. All I have to say to myself is to just chill and give myself a break once in a while. Burning myself out is not going to help anyone.

5) It's all about setting goals that inspire. The list I compiled was full of things I dreaded. Packing all my things, sorting things out that needed sorting, getting all the work-stuff done before the move, cleaning, organizing and so on. Yuck! There was not one inspiring goal on that list. No make a blog business plan, or get nails done every week, or eat a healthy meal every day. Nothing that would motivate me to get going. It was all chores. I love goal setting, but I truly failed this time.

This challenge taught me a lot, so I guess it was still worth it. Did anyone else participate? If yes, how did yo do? Or, have you ever taken on a similar challenge?

I'm definitely going to do some challenges now and again. I'm not going to promise it'll be one each month, but we'll see what the new year has in store.

Have a wonderful weekend, friends!

xo. Hanna

Favorite Things: Just breathe

I've been trying to be more present in my life lately. It's so easy to get lost in the bits and pieces of everyday life, that it can quickly feel like time is just passing us by without us even realizing it. I don't want to someday wonder where all the time went. The only time we have is right now. We should make every day, every moment count. It's all we have.

1 // 2 // 3 // 4 // 5 // 6 // 7 // 8 // 9

Why do I blog?

It seems that Elsie's post about blogging sparked a discussion in the blogosphere. For me, it couldn't have come at a better time. I've been asking myself some hard questions lately, one of them being "Why do I blog?". Not an easy question to answer as it turns out. Elsie and Melissa both wrote about some interesting points that made me dig deeper into the question of why. So, to organize my thoughts, and maybe spark yours, I thought I'd write about my own blogging journey and the reasons behind it.

the design of my first blog is still a little embarrassing

I started my very first blog back in February 2008. I shared my craft projects on a very popular Estonian crafting site that brought together a community of like-minded people, and I really wanted to be a part of it. I remember the anxiety and excitement before hitting the publish button for the very first time. Will people like what I do? Will anybody comment? Will I be accepted into the community? I couldn't check my comment form often enough to see whether someone had noticed me.

Fast forward to 2009. I got some attention, but I wasn't really happy with my blog. It just wasn't inspiring me anymore. I craved change, a wider audience, and a fresh start. So, I created my second blog Hapa's Eco Renewals (not the best name, unfortunately) and started blogging in English instead of my native Estonian. That's when I really dove into the blogging world. I started following other creative bloggers and blogging more and more. A year into my second blog I first started to think about maybe someday turning my blog into some sort of business venture. At that time I wasn't really sure about my university studies and I couldn't seem to find my true passion. I loved making things, so why not make that my career?

Then, in 2011 I decided to go for my childhood dream of becoming a singer. From the first lessons I was hooked and I felt I'd found my true passion. That feeling has not changed. All the while I kept blogging and even with my passion for singing, my multi-passionate mind couldn't let go of the idea of creating a successful blog. So, in 2012 I created Pearls & Scissors.

Finally, after all these years of trial and error I created something I was proud of. I worked very hard on this blog, at the same time getting my Master's degree in psychology, and studying singing full-time. It was a crazy year, but I managed to juggle it all. Then life happened and I had to put the blog on the back-burner. Now, I finally feel settled again and I find myself at the cross-roads, again - do I continue blogging as just a hobby, or do I turn it into a side business?

I still haven't made up my mind. There are pros and cons to both ways of blogging. But, no matter what road I (or you) take, the most important thing is to remember why I started in the first place, and why I keep on blogging. Here's my top 3 reasons:

1. It's fun! For me, this has always been the point that brings me back to blogging, even if I've lost the drive for awhile. I think it should always be fun. Even if you're monetizing your blog, blogging should still bring you joy. Without the fun factor, it can feel like just a lot of hard work (which it is). That's also the biggest concern for me when it comes to monetizing my blog. I wonder if I'm still going to feel the excitement when I know I have to create posts to keep my promise to my sponsors? Will I have enough creative energy to keep this blog thriving? And, above all else, do I really have the time to give it my best? I wouldn't want to compromise my dream of becoming an operatic singer, because that is my ultimate goal. But, that is a longer discussion for another post.

2. I love to share and interact! Connection is the second key concept in blogging for me. I wouldn't be blogging if I just wanted to document my creative endeavors. I wouldn't be creating tutorials, if I didn't want to share my knowledge. I wouldn't be commenting if I didn't want to connect. Without you to share my thoughts, inspiration, ideas, and projects with, this blog would be worthless to me. So, thank you for sticking with me for a shorter or longer period! I value every single comment and e-mail you've sent. And I'd love to connect even more in the future.

3. I want to inspire! Seeing that somebody is inspired by my tutorial or has used it to make something for themselves is like a high for me. I love helping people, so it's such a thrill to see that my knowledge and ideas have helped someone bring more creativity into their lives. Because, creativity is the best therapy, right? I truly believe in that, and I hope I can keep on inspiring.

Now, I'd love to hear from you - Why do you blog? 

Thank you for reading!

Sunday Spirit: The journey of change

I've been thinking a lot about change lately. Changes that have happened in my life, my thoughts, my perspectives, even my hopes and dreams. Sometimes I forget, that change is the only constant in life. Everything that we experience makes a little dent in our minds and therefor changes us in a way. If you think about it that way, change feels a natural part of life, doesn't it? Yes.... but why then is it so hard to accept?

Change is so dear to my heart right now because this year will be a wonderful journey for me, full of expected, and certainly, unexpected changes. I'm not only preparing to take a new step towards my dream career as a singer, but I'm also preparing to take the biggest leap of faith with the man I love. And to top it off, I'm preparing to move to a new country. I'm full of change these days, you might say, and I've got to be honest, it scared the crap out of me at first.

As I thought about this, I made a conscious decision to welcome change. Sometimes it's like taking a step in a dark room, but then again, you never know what greatness you might stumble upon. And, since change is about to occur anyway, I'd rather embrace it than be afraid of it. I should probably write that on my mirror...

What's your relationship with change? Are you welcoming it with open arms, or rather waiting anxiously? I'd love to hear your thoughts on this.