A latte thoughts, a latte talk & a latte feelings

Did you know that although I'm a self-proclaimed coffee lover I actually only drink Café Latte? I make them at home and drink about 3 a day.

Come, pour yourself a cup of jo and have a seat. I feel as if we haven't really had time to catch up lately. I've been busy. You've probably also been busy, right? I miss our little chats and so I thought it was time to do something about that.

I've shared bits and pieces of my business lately, like how I enrolled in B-School, and how the blog is doing financially, and how taking myself more seriously has had some unexpected results, but I haven't really talked about how I'm doing, have I? So what's Hanna up to these days?

I feel like every day is a sort of a roller coaster for me. There are good days (mostly the sunny ones) where I feel full of energy to create, and photograph, and most of all, am hopeful that things will fall into place - that somehow an opportunity will arise that will lead us into an easier situation. But then there are also days where it's not that easy. Those mornings when I wish the alarm clock would just shut up and I could sleep for hours on end, and not do anything. But, I know that is not who I am, and that is not what's going to make me happy. So, I drag myself out of bed every morning and start doing what's on my list. Some days are more successful than others, but I know that no matter what, at least I'll have done something by the end of the night. And that, as I've learned, is what makes me tick - creative time and ticking things of the list.

I've been digging deeper into who I am these past few days. Not that I didn't know who I was before, but to analyze certain sides of me. We had an assignment for B-School that entailed finding out our biggest strengths by way of doing a test and also asking our friends what they thought our biggest strengths were. Reading the results was like looking into a mirror. I always new I had those qualities, but seeing them written out and explained was sort of liberating. It was like I was being given permission to be who I am. Even more, I was celebrated for traits I had disliked at times, like my over-achiever quality, my constant stream of ideas and the need to always be after something new. Sometimes it makes me feel as if I'm all over the place and don't know what I really want. I could finally see how good these qualities really are, and how much they can help me get to where I want to be, if I learn to use them to my advantage. I think that's the biggest gain from studying yourself with these sorts of tests - they help you make sense of how you could best use the qualities and personality traits you have. It's a constant process of self-discovery and affirmation. And, day by day, I feel better about my multi-passionate over-achiever self. Who says you can only pursue one passion? Or do one thing in life?

These days, my time pretty much consist of doing projects and writing for the blog, doing B-School, trying to develop the business from all angles possible, and singing in between. There's a lot of behind the scenes stuff that I don't share on the blog, mostly because it's simple boring. Like developing ad programs, finding exposure opportunities and ways to better grow my business. Snooze.... But, you know what? It's actually the perfect balance of all my passions grammed into one day. And that's something I'm hugely grateful for. Despite the tough times.

There are two things I miss about working outside of home, though. The first is the interactions with people. I love talking! I love communicating (which was actually also one of my top 5 strengths according to both the test and my friends)! I need to grow this blog fast so I could hire an assistant already. Ha, just kidding! It's probably going to take a few years until I can afford that.

The other thing is getting dressed and doing my hair and make-up. I know, I could still do that, but it's so easy to be lazy and just throw something on in the morning rather than put together an outfit, much less mess with my hair and put on make-up. But, I'm slowly making progress.

As for the outside job front, so far I've only had bad news. I've had nothing but rejection letters coming my way. I'm currently looking at babysitter jobs, but I'm getting rejections from those as well. Man, those Germans just can't give me a break. I'm actually pretty smart, and funny, and an over-all nice person, but I somehow can't get that message across. Still hoping something might pop up, though. Any good advice from German readers?

Whew! That was a lot of talk, but I so enjoyed being able to share this with you.

How have you been, my friend?

xo. Hanna